


Fire in the water

by Sol_Koroleva



Category: The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Alarkling - Freeform, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, also my first fic pls be nice, darklina trashcan, kiddding just tell me if i should stop writing, post king of scars, this is a lil bit angsty???
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-03-10
Packaged: 2019-11-14 23:02:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18061871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sol_Koroleva/pseuds/Sol_Koroleva
Summary: Post King of Scars/ contains spoilersTheres no darkness without light,so when the Black Heretic is back, it leaves Alina wondering who would win the game this time.





	Fire in the water

She wakes up,trying to forget the face she just saw in her dream. Tries to forget the gray eyes,pale skin,raven black hair. His face haunts her ever since she killed him. At first,she felt deep void inside her. She thought that it was caused by her powers disappearing. But after a few years she came to the thought that maybe she’s empty because he’s dead.

 

 

“ _Why_ ” - they ask him the same question over and over but only he knows the truth. It’s like drowning. He feels his heart clenching when he’s locked up in a cell and Sobachka is standing in front of him, waiting for an answer. Aleksander waits for his answer too.

“Where is she? ” The question never leaves his mind.

“I will talk only with her.” He added.

Aleksander had everything. The power,the throne. But he never really had her, did he? She kept running back from him. Not because she was scared. No,she never was scared of him but of his power. She saw Aleksander,not the name he has given himself and now tries to bury deep into the ground. He never wants to be that creature again. After he felt that knife going through his chest he panicked. And then his powers left him. Now he was just Aleksander.

“ You’re back and that’s the only thing you want to know ?” Nikolai is clasping his hands behind his back. The picture of confidence. He’s the king now. But that doesn’t matter.

Aleksander has heard the rumors. They told him that she’s dead. That she died with him and was burned at the same stack as him. The panic took over his body and he didn’t feel his hands and feet anymore. What is this feeling, deep inside,crawling back at the surface? In other life, he wouldn’t know. He would shake it off and say that it makes people weak. Now he was closer to knowing but it still frightened him.

“ You want to know why? I spent my entire life trapped in a cage I’ve done by myself. There was no hope in my life. No light. Until I met her. And now you’re telling me that she’s gone?” His frustration started to build up, the feeling of anxiety close to taking hold of his entire being.

“ Don’t tell me that you care about her. I will never believe a word from your mouth after all you’ve done. I don’t care that you claim to come back different. I need you to save Ravka. You either help me or I’ll have you hanging by the next sunrise.”

So he made his decision. Just so he could maybe see her again,one day. He dreamed of her every night. Wearing so many masks, he couldn’t count it. One night she was sitting on a throne next to him, a black crown with sapphires on her head, the other she had her silver knife twisted inside his heart. As painful as it was to see her, it was his only whisper of hope. He loved moments when she was coming back but couldn’t take it when she was leaving. She was leaving him in pieces.

 

 

Nikolai knocked the door of a little,wooden house in the middle of the forest near Os Alta. He knew too well that from the windows of the house you could see the mountains,glittering in snow.

He wondered if the sight was giving Alina as much peace as it did him. She needed it, especially after losing someone very dear to her.

The illness spread over the country very fast. People said that it came from the Fold. It took so many people’s lives,including Mal. Alina didn’t take it easily. She became a living doll. For the first two months she only cried,didn’t want to eat. She was his friend,and he hated seeing her in pain. So he tried to help her to ease the pain as much as he could. He knew that some scars in her heart will never heal. But she was too strong to live in despair.

The doors opened and he saw Alina,her white hair in a bun,dressed all in black. He didn’t want to know why she was wearing exactly this color.

“I was going to send a letter to you but apparently you have a gift of predicting the future, moi tsar.” She said in a playful tone. Alina was always known for her humor. She always seemed to cheer him up,even in the worst situations.

“ That’s just one of my talents. Is that something we could talk about while sipping your cranberry tea?” He was glad that after two years she was finally in her old self. “Wait for me in a living room. I have this chocolate cookies to spoil you even more.” She said and disappeared in the kitchen.

He looked around the small room. Most of the space was taken by books. It seems that she had hundreds of them. They were everywhere: bookshelves full, piles of them on the table, the floor. She seemed to find peace in reading. He was going look at some titles,but she came back with a tray and two cups of hot tea. Her good mood seemed to disappear and she became nervous. That worried him.

“Alina,what happened? You know you can tell me anything,right?” It was always like that with these two. No matter what,they would have each other secrets.

“I know” she said,fidgeting her fingers. “ I’m going to be honest with you.”

“You always are,Alina. Just tell me what happened and we will try to solve this problem” He had so many problems to solve right now. But the main one was that one about the Darkling being back from the dead. It still sounded crazy. But the word crazy equaled the word Darkling so he wasn’t even surprised. He wanted to tell Alina about this straight away,but seeing her troubled face,stopped him.

She looked straight into his eyes “My powers are back.” He stared at her for a good minute before he opened his mouth to speak. He wanted to ask how but deep inside he knew exactly how.

“It stared slowly. One bit of sunlight there and there. It started while mal was still here. But two days ago my power came back in full force. I wasn’t ready for this and it left me lying on the floor for the entire day” she confessed, that look in her eyes telling him that she felt weak.

She stared at him,waiting for his answer. He knew that losing her powers broke her in so many ways. She lost it after she learned to love it. She loved her powers so dearly,loved the feeling of certainty. As bad as it sounded,her powers were the mirror of the ones possessed by the Darkling. And in some twisted way they really were matched together.

“ You do the math,Alina. You’re smart. You know I didn’t come here just for the tea.” He was still afraid of telling the news to her.

He was afraid she could broke again. He needed her whole, and happy. But it seemed happiness was a hard thing to win. “He really is back then.” She said,but Alina was staring outside the window,like she could see someone there.

“Yes. But he’s... different. And I don’t mean his features. I mean, I’m still more handsome than him but that’s always been a fact.” He smiled,trying to cheer her up.

She smiled and swatted his hand “ You’re horrible.”

“He said he will only talk with you." - silence.

"We need him Alina. He might finally help us to finally have piece in Ravka. He really... changed. I know it sounds crazy but it really is.”

She closed her eyes and exhaled loudly “what do you mean?”

“It’s not like I threatened him to cut his head off if he doesn’t help me. He said he will negotiate only with you. But I cannot ask this of you. It would be your another sacrifice. I just want you to know the truth, I—-“

“I will go.” She breathed out.

He thought that his mind was messing with him,but she smiled.

 

 

It was all like a dream.

She didn’t know it was a bad or a good one,but definitely a dream. She saw his face everywhere,but that was just a ghost.

And now he was really sitting in a cell in Os Alta. She didn’t quite believe it. And she felt disgusted of herself that after everything he did,she still was anxious to see him. Alina remembered her tears while he was dying and after that finally came to her senses. Now she knew that although he was evil,and greedy for power, she came to love him. He was the only one who matched her in every way. And it scared her,made her run away from him. Of course she loved Mal, he was her first love. But it was a matter of time until he would leave her. Like everyone, eventually.

But Aleksander would always stay,and wait for her.

She traveled by his horse. She took care of the him after his owner disappeared. He took liking of her and loved her attention. All dressed in black, on a black horse, she stepped through the gates of Os Alta to see her worst enemy.

 

 

He woke up with a jolt,and pain in his heart.

It was pulsing, and he couldn’t think of anything. Was it another dream? He seemed to get used to having panic attacks after every night. He would rather not sleep at all than this. He rose from the ground and sat by the small window,with the sight at the front gates to the castle.

He closed his eyes and just breathed the air,filling his lungs and calming him a bit. How low he fell,to be stuck in a cell, being imprisoned by the Lantsov prince. But at the same time, he didn’t care a bit. He felt at ease.

He was free of that voice inside his head which kept commanding him. He finally didn’t feel like falling. But he couldn’t say that he was complete. He still had his powers, not as many as before but he still had one. It was his missing equal. He would gladly agree to be killed just so he could see her beautiful face for a moment. He never dared to admit before that he might care for her. Genya asked him that one and he thought that she was out of her mind. Maybe wanting made him weak, her every smile,every time she run away from him, and every time she kept back. He was drawn to her.But he was just too afraid of what it could do to him. He wanted to save Ravka so bad that he nearly destroyed his country.

His only demand was to see Alina for one moment, But that wasn’t really a demand. It was a need. A need to rely on someone. He was done being alone for so many years. But he knew that it wasn’t possible. He welcomed death. He preferred death because he wouldn’t have to live a life with her somewhere away from him,without knowing what he felt for her.

He again looked through the window, wanting to take another fresh inhale,but he nearly choked when he saw someone clad in black,on a black horse,entering the gates. It was his horse, and the person wore his colors.

He started wondering what was happening but then the persons hood fell back and he saw long,white long curls,cascading down the back of this person. He would recognize this hair anywhere. Aleksander didn’t know how to breathe. His hands where shaking and he could stand. He started falling to the floor when Alina turned in a way, he could see her face. He collapsed to his knees and for the first time in his life, wept.

 

 

The halls were clad in darkness and Alina could hear only her steps.

The darkness seemed to be endless but she wasn’t afraid of it, not anymore. As she was getting closer to the Darklings cell, her fingers started to shake and the feeling of greed was taking over her. When the guard stopped at the end of the corridor he pointed out the door and said:

“It’s here.”

She thanked him and he disappeared.

Alina waited for a few seconds before she opened the cell doors and saw him.

He was sitting on a chair next to the window. When she stepped into the room he turned his head so he could stare at her. All words left her mouth as she saw tears streaming down his beautiful face.

Nikolai said that day by day he was looking like the old Darkling and it was true. She remembered his beautiful eyes and strong jaw. She wanted to stroke his cheek. She wanted to collapse to her knees. But she didn’t do any of this as she heard his broken voice:

“My _Solnishka_ , have you finally come to save me?”


End file.
